In Dong Xian's PDA: Time...frozen

I asked Leo to meet me at Casablanca. There are other places in the hotel, but somehow, I like the bar in Casablanca...

As soon as I pushed the door open, I saw you, at the bottom of the stairs... maybe I have over—reacted... maybe I should hear your side of the story... if you could stop for a moment...

But Han Tai Jun was behind you...

So, where you went, he followed too...

You did not notice me at first, but ...

The clock stopped ticking. Time was frozen...

You stopped. I stopped.

You were so close to me, and if I stretch my hand, I could touch you. I thought I could even smell your perfume from where I stood.

But Han Tai Jun was there too, with you...

There could only be one: Han Tai Jun or Shin Dong Xian.

It has to be Shin Dong Xian.

I kept my head down. I have to.

I couldn't afford to lift my head up...

I couldn't afford to take a glimpse of you...

I couldn't afford to lose my focus...

I couldn't afford to go soft...

I couldn't afford to let my heart rule... as I couldn't afford to lose the war... as it had to be Shin Dong Xian...

The clock started ticking again... Time to move on...

I lifted my head up, looked straight ahead of me. I could not see you anymore.

All I could see now is Leo at the bar ... the hotel behind the bar... you are behind the hotel. To get to you, I must get pass the hotel first... so I kept walking... I just kept walking...

Then, at the bar, I could not bear the pain and took a look towards the door: if you are still there, I could take one more look at you... if you are gone, I did not have to see you...

At the half-opened door, my eyes caught you: the dim yellow light from the outside on your lifeless face... You are looking at me.

I felt a sharp pain on my chest: just when the wound started to heal, it was ripped open again...

No, I could not allow myself feel anything. I tried to turn off all my senses, but it is too late...

You turned away, walked out. The door shut, and you are gone. I could have stopped you at the door, but I let you go....

Use your head, Shin Dong Xian, USE YOUR HEAD!! War is on. For every war, there will be casualty. What matters is who emerged as the winner in the end.

"Where have you been the whole day?" Leo asked.

Hiding, thinking, planning... I HAVE TO WIN!

"Leo, attack: we will start our attack tomorrow." To win, I have to attack.

Zhen Yin's thoughts: That seat... your seat...

I feel really drained on the following day. Yes, I am aware that I do look pale and lifeless, just like Manager Lee mentioned.

The phone rang, could that be … turned out to be GM Han. What’s up? Ok, I know. Not in the correct frame of mind … I have actually forgotten Tai Jun’s birthday. Sorry, Tai Jun. We talked a while on the second level of Casablanca. Had a cocktail but really no appetite for cake. Worried about the hotel status, Madam Cui’s misunderstanding, being late for our date at the church, missing you badly … I really can’t bring myself to smile. Anyway, Happy Birthday, my friend, Tai Jun!

I walked down the main staircase.

Midway down the staircase, I stopped. Through that same slit, I took a long look at that that bar counter. Leo. All I see is Leo. That seat is empty. Your seat is empty. Then, from here, I retreated up the staircase. At Casablanca, you held my hand tightly, you dried my tears gently, we promised to meet each other at the church. I couldn’t make it on time but that wasn’t deliberate. My heart has gone there well before midnight. Do you know? I wasn’t given a chance to explain … sad …

I proceeded further down the steps.

I reached the bottom of the main staircase. Lifted my head and … saw you … saw you walking into Casablanca. I looked at you, focused on you ... I haven’t seen you since late last night. I missed you, hope to explain to you, about why I am late, about us … Time froze. I stopped. Felt you stopped. We stopped. Walk up to each other? … You walked past me, didn’t even turn to look at me … You forgot about me or you didn’t notice me? Sadly, I was rooted on the spot. I swallowed that acute pain and sadness, felt wetness in my eyes.

My legs are heavy. I walked towards the door, which is also where you just came in. Like the other time, when we arranged to meet … I turned, tried to get a backward glance at you … one look, just one more look …